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Correction/Psychiatrie

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction/Psychiatrie
Message de evanna30 posté le 20-02-2015 à 13:34:58 (S | E | F)
Good morning.
I'll be glad if if anyone can make corrections to my text I have to present for an oral English at university. Thank you for your help.

Abstract : Psychiatry is a place where we treat emotional and mental problems. The aim is to understand the different modalities of admission in hospital care in a psychiatric service. The psychiatric unit for teenagers in Nimes Hospital is a psychiatric services that welcomes young people from different backgrounds and with various behavioral disorders. Adolescence is above all a period of change. In a context, teenagers often express psychological conflict as violent or aggressive behavior directed toward others or turned against the self. This study will also present various solutions to teenagers.

Hi, I am Pascale. I am sophomore in psychology at the University of Nîmes. I have a 16 year old teenager. My son is in hight school. I work at the hospital since 1998. Currently, I work nights in the full time psychiatry- unit- for teens. It’s a closed service. We work as part of a multidisciplinary team alongside child psychiatrist, psychologist, education workers, psycho-motor therapist and nurses .We receive teenagers suffer disorder, anorexia, schizophrenia. Some were raped, others are offenders and closed educational centers. Many of these young people are admitted for attempted suicide more often drug or by hanging. Some of these children live in MECS, in places of living in host families. They have been placed by the judge OPP children. We do medical surveillance, reinsurance, maintenance nursing, therapeutic workshops.
That is why, for my subject oral, I will speak of psychiatry.
The term "psychiatry" was introduced for the first time in Germany by Johann Christian Reil in 1808, the field of psychiatry extends the diagnosis, treatment, through the prevention of mental disorders, including various cognitive disorders, behavioral and emotional. In France, the segmentation is a principle of public psychiatry. Each well-defined geographical area corresponds to a specific psychiatric facility.
First I'll tell you about the admission procedures in psychiatry and then I will service adolescent psychiatric unit of Nimes.
You should know only people with psychiatric disorders are likely to be providing care without their consent. Hospitalization must be accompanied by two medical certificates dated less than 15 days.
When it is impossible to get a request from a third emergency, there is an imminent danger procedure.
The terms of admission may be different:
Sector psychiatrist can apply for admission but often many emergency admissions. Psychiatric care with restricted freedom are framed by legal procedures that ensure respect for the rights and freedoms of patients while ensuring their protection.

SDT or in case of imminent danger care at the request of a third ( Act of 5 July 2011 as amended by the Act of September 27, 2013)
SDTU care at the request of third emergency. When it is impossible to get a request from a third emergency, there is an imminent danger procedure.
ASPDRE Care Decisions of the State representative

Now I'll tell you about the psychiatric unit Nimes. The Nîmes hospital inaugurated Friday, October 18, 2013 the clinic building psychiatric. Old clinic, built in 1971 no longer met the needs and comfort of patients, the expectations of caregivers
Patients are admitted to the psychiatric division according to the psychiatric specialty to which they belong and not according to their places of origin. Note that the focus is in development on activities such as occupational therapy, music therapy, psychomotor or sports. Several units are spread throughout the building. Mood disorders clinic, medical clinic for teens psychological, clinical medical psychology of the elderly and clinical medical psychology of young adult.
In unit full time for teens is a psychiatric service, the goal is to provide a framework containing source of security, protection of teens with respect to itself, to the teenager-family relationship, adolescent-third, when the relationship faces difficulties with behavior problems and pipelines. Physical restraint, the isolation room can be a therapeutic means when they are used to immobilize the face violence.
Diagnostic assessment takes into account the psychopathological assumptions and analysis of social and family interactions.
In adolescence the finding of a disruption in the environment is a factor péjorativ. The lack framework limit can only encourage and amplify the appearance of pipe breaks. (Marcelli and Poacher)
Therapeutic workshops aim to develop the capacity for autonomy and socialization to arouse creativity. Prescription of chemotherapy should be part of a care plan. It is necessary to obtain the informed consent of the young and responsible adults.

I would end this presentation with a quote from Kammerer:
"successive generations by transmitting a debt, that of having to humanize life"
Thank you for listening.


-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 20-02-2015 13:48


Réponse: Correction/Psychiatrie de here4u, postée le 20-02-2015 à 13:39:52 (S | E)
Hello

Oh dear ! It's much too long to be done in one go ...

Abstract : Psychiatry is a place where we treat emotional and mental problems. The aim is to understand the different modalities of admission in hospital care in a psychiatric service. The psychiatric unit for teenagers in Nimes Hospital is a psychiatric services that welcomes young people from different backgrounds and with various behavioral disorders. Adolescence is above all a period of change. In a context, teenagers often express psychological conflict as violent or aggressive behavior directed toward others or turned against the self. This study will also present various solutions to teenagers.


Hi, I am Pascale. I am X sophomore in psychology at the University of Nîmes. I have a 16 year old teenager (I'm the mother of....). My son is in hight school. I work at the hospital since 1998. Currently, I work nights in the full time psychiatry- unit- for teens. It’s a closed service. We work as part of a multidisciplinary team alongside child psychiatrist, psychologist, education workers, psycho-motor therapist and nurses .We receive teenagers suffer XXXXdisorders such as anorexia, schizophrenia. Some were raped, others are offenders and ??? (in ? out of ???)closed educational centers. Many of these young people are admitted for attempted suicide more often XX drug or by hanging. Some of these children live in MECS(make it( clear), in (places of living in) host families. They have been placed by the judge OPP children. We do medical surveillance, reinsurance, maintenance nursing, therapeutic workshops.
That is why, for my subject oral, I will speak of psychiatry.

The term "psychiatry" was introduced for the first time in Germany by Johann Christian Reil in 1808, the field of psychiatry extends XX the diagnosis, treatment, through the prevention of mental disorders, including various cognitive disorders, behavioral and emotional. In France, the 'segmentation'(geographical division?= sectorisation .) is a principle of public psychiatry. Each well-defined geographical area corresponds to a specific psychiatric facility.
First I'll tell you about the admission procedures in psychiatry and then I will service ??? adolescent psychiatric unit of Nimes.
You should know only people with (suffering from heavy)psychiatric disorders are likely to be providing care without their consent. Hospitalization must be accompanied by two medical certificates dated less than 15 days.

Interesting ! I'll go on later !




Réponse: Correction/Psychiatrie de here4u, postée le 21-02-2015 à 00:17:44 (S | E)
Hi !

When it is impossible to get a request from a third emergency,??? there is an imminent danger procedure.
The terms of admission may be different:
Sector psychiatrist can apply for admission but often many emergency admissions (???). Psychiatric care with restricted freedom are framed by legal procedures that ensure respect for the rights and freedoms of patients while ensuring their protection.

SDT or in case of imminent danger care at the request of a third ( Act of 5 July 2011 as amended by the Act of September 27, 2013)
SDTU care at the request of third emergency. When it is impossible to get a request from a third emergency, there is an imminent danger procedure.(You're repeating yourself ... and it's not clearer ...- I mean if people don't know what you're writing about ...)
ASPDRE Care Decisions of the State representative

Now I'll tell you about the psychiatric unit IN Nimes. The Nîmes hospital inaugurated Friday, October 18, 2013 the clinic building psychiatric.Revoir l'ordre des mots et segments ...)XXX Old clinic, built in 1971 no longer met the needs and comfort of patients, the expectations of caregivers.

Les quelques liognes suivantes ne me semblent pas claires du tout ...Est-ce à cause du sujet très technique ? est-ce parce que vous semblez juxtaposer des bribes de sens sans vraiment les lier ? C'est, en tout cas, l'impression ressentie ... Sorry !



Réponse: Correction/Psychiatrie de violet91, postée le 21-02-2015 à 12:09:42 (S | E)
Bonjour ,
J'ajouterai à cet exposé tout à fait intéressant :
- À mon sens , avant toute chose , vous devriez rappeler l'étymologie de psychiatrie ( ancient Greek and symbol 'butterfly ' ) then be a little more explicit when speaking of its German introduction .
- vous êtes en France ; préférez de l'anglais britannique ( comportement = orthographe , d'autant plus que vous avez étudié un jour , en terminale( philosophie ) , ce qu'était le 'behaviourism(e) '. )
- la psychiatrie n'est pas un lieu, mais un champ d'études , une branche médicale .
- vous devez confondre 'for ' et 'from ' . Vous avez besoin du premier ou de l'expression 'en cas de ' : traduction littérale .
- relisez -vous bien : vous avez tendance à oublier des 's'' ou autres marques de pluriel .
- il serait bon de présenter un peu ce que sont les 'psychiatry pipelines '.
- pourquoi ce mot 'péjorative' en fin de phrase ? Pourquoi ce terme ? Place de l'adjectif anglais quand il est épithète ( dans le groupe déterminant ) .

- Vrai que le dernier paragraphe est inégalement bon ( apparaît comme fait à la hâte) par rapport au reste . Reprenez vos phrases en les structurant clairement , en étoffant un peu ce qui ne parle pas aux connaisseurs ...Tendez à faire aussi bien que dans les deux tiers de l'exposé .

Votre citation de conclusion paraît un peu 'plaquée' . Amenez -la dans une phrase complète ( si vous choisissez celle -là ?) pour éclairer tout ce que vous avez dit précédemment et conclure sur le sens et l'objectif de la psychiatrie secteur adolescence .

Entraînez -vous à l'oral avec quelqu'un qui maîtrise bien l'anglais parlé , respirez calmement et appuyez sur les mots forts , comme sur les articulations du raisonnement . Il serait parfait de maîtriser le texte 'par cœur ' ( sans le réciter ) pour vous détacher du papier et regarder le 'public ' .
Bonne chance .




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