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Spaces and exchanges/Aide

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Spaces and exchanges/Aide
Message de dixoeufs posté le 26-12-2014 à 09:53:06 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous!
Je suis en Terminale S et je travaille actuellement sur la notion espaces et échanges en anglais. J'ai terminé de rédiger ma notion et j'aimerais avoir votre aide. Pouvez-vous m'aider à corriger mes fautes, s'il vous plait?

I’m going to talk about global cities in order to illustrate the notion: spaces and exchanges. The concept of space corresponds to geographic locations that have some influence on the world. An exchange is an act of giving and receiving something else in return. We must now apply these definitions to the world system. A global city is a city having a strategic position in diverse domains, mainly economic, political and cultural at the world level and establishing a concentration of communications, because of globalization.
How global cities, as geographical spaces, can have an impact on people’s lifes?
First of all, I will look at the impact of global cities on people everyday lives and then, I’ll analyse the future of the politic leads by the global cities about the people’s living conditions.

Firstly, the global cities have real impacts positive as well as negative on the population in everyday lives.
At first, the positive aspects of a global city are numerous. The inhabitants have access to numerous services. Indeed, the strong economic developments that know the global cities allow these cities to invest in diverse infrastructures. Equally, the access to culture is another major positive aspect of the global cities. A lot of foreigners come all over the world to work or to study enriching them with new languages and cultures. Global Cities propose also a high quality of education on account of their world-class universities.
However, the growth of urban concentrations and overcrowding has given rise to a number of issues over the years. For that matter, the cities are increasingly dirty with no greenery. They caused numerous congestions in transports and life in metropolis is also pretty expensive. But the most problematic drawback is the pollution of the air, particularly in the center of these cities.
For instance, during the Great Smog due to the factories pollution in 1952, was a severe air pollution event that affected London during December. The inhabitants of London knew health problems because of the unbreathable sight. It is considered as the biggest air pollution event in the history of the United Kingdom.
Secondly, the global cities are aware of their weaknesses. That’s why they managed to lead a future politic, which will be beneficial for our society in general. The current and the future objective of the global cities is to reduce negative aspects of the globalisation to improve the quality of urban living conditions its inhabitants. To make it become possible, Global cities develops also a special politic: the sustainable development. The goal of this politic is to make economic growth and environmental protection go hand in hand. All these ambitions explain the strict legislation of Singapore, which managed to return the almost non-existent criminality.
While for instance, Singapore can be considered as “a perfect society” where everything is orderly, clean and efficient, on account of its strict legislation, it’s nevertheless a fact that people’s personal freedoms are surrendered. That’s why this kind of politic is a source of proceedings.
We can also speak about London politic as example. In fact, many projects like the BedZED project may lead the way towards the sustainable cities of the future. One could also look at many programmes in operation in OECD urban areas to improve transport as part of a drive to make urban living conditions healthier and more environmentally friendly.

To conclude, global cities, like London or Singapore, have a real impact on people and on exchanges. The impacts of these cities, marked by a dense and a merging people from different countries can be as well positive as negative. The growth of global cities seems to continue in the view of the future objectives of global cities. In my opinion, I think the model of global cities isn’t a good thing, humanly talked. Our generation is at an experimental stage to find solutions to answer the many futures objectives of global cities. However, we don’t know the time it’ll take to find revolutionary ideas. Maybe, it’ll be too late. So, should we try hard to improve this model, or should we find an other way of order the world economy and exchanges?

Merci d'avance!

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 26-12-2014 11:43


Réponse: Spaces and exchanges/Aide de yaya18, postée le 26-12-2014 à 13:17:19 (S | E)
Hello,
je suis en 2nde et j'ai récemment fait un travail qui s'en approche donc je pense pouvoir t'aider

I’m going to talk about global cities in order to illustrate the notion: spaces and exchanges. The concept of space corresponds to geographic locations that have some influence (pluriel) on the world. An exchange is an act of giving and receiving something else in return. We must now apply these definitions to the world system. A global city is a city having (Pourquoi un verbe en -ING ?) a strategic position in diverse domains, mainly economic, political and cultural at the world level and establishing a concentration of communications, because of globalization.
How global cities, as geographical spaces, can have an impact on people’s lifes?
First of all, I will look at the impact of global cities on people everyday lives and then, I’ll analyse the future of the politic leads by the global cities about the people’s living conditions.

Firstly, the global cities have real impacts positive (ordre des adjectifs) as well as negative on the population in everyday lives.
At first, the positive aspects of a global city are numerous. The inhabitants have access to numerous services. Indeed, the strong economic developments that know the global cities allow these cities to invest in diverse infrastructures. Equally, the access to culture is another major positive aspect of the global cities. A lot of foreigners come all (avant le verbe) over the world to work or to study by enriching them with new languages and cultures. Global Cities propose also (avant le verbe) a high quality of education on account of their world-class universities.
However, the growth of urban concentrations and overcrowding has given rise to a number of issues over the years. For that matter, the cities are increasingly dirty with no greenery. They caused numerous congestions in transports and life in metropolis is also (avant le verbe !) pretty expensive. But the most problematic drawback is the pollution of the air, particularly in the center of these cities.
For instance, during the Great Smog due to the factories pollution in 1952, was a severe air pollution event that affected London during December. The inhabitants of London knew health problems because of the unbreathable sight. It is considered as the biggest air pollution event in the history of the United Kingdom.
Secondly, the global cities are aware of their weaknesses. That’s why they managed to lead a future politic, which will be beneficial for our society in general. The current and the future objective of the global cities is to reduce negative aspects of the globalisation to improve the quality of urban living conditions X its inhabitants. To make it become possible, Global cities develops also (Encore la mauvaise place ) a special politic: the sustainable development. The goal of this politic is to make economic growth and environmental protection go hand in hand. All these ambitions explain the strict legislation of Singapore, which managed to return the almost non-existent criminality.
While for instance, Singapore can be considered as “a perfect society” where everything is orderly, clean and efficient, on account of its strict legislation, it’s nevertheless a fact that people’s personal freedoms are surrendered. That’s why this kind of politic is a source of proceedings.
We can also (Tu connais la suite...) speak about London politic as example. In fact, many projects like the BedZED project may lead the way towards the sustainable cities of the future. One could also look at many programmes in operation in OECD urban areas to improve transport as part of a drive to make urban living conditions healthier and more environmentally friendly.

To conclude, global cities, like London or Singapore, have a real impact on people and on exchanges. The impacts of these cities, marked by a dense and a merging people from different countries can be as well positive as negative. The growth of global cities seems to continue in the view of the future objectives of global cities. In my opinion, I think the model of global cities isn’t a good thing, humanly talked. Our generation is at an experimental stage to find solutions to answer the many futures objectives of global cities. However, we don’t know the time it’ll take to find revolutionary ideas. Maybe, it’ll be too late. So, should we try hard to improve this model, or should we find an other way of order the world economy and exchanges?

Have a good day

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 26-12-2014 17:57



Réponse: Spaces and exchanges/Aide de notrepere, postée le 26-12-2014 à 17:48:07 (S | E)
Bonjour

I’m going to talk about global cities in order to illustrate the notion: spaces and exchanges. The concept of space corresponds to geographic locations that have some influence on the world. An exchange is an act of giving and receiving something else in return. We must now apply these definitions to the world system. A global city is a city having a strategic position in diverse domains, mainly economic, political and cultural at the world level and establishing a concentration of communications, because of globalization.
How global cities, as geographical spaces, can (mal placé; il faut le mettre après "How") have an impact on people’s lifes (pluriel irregulier)?
First of all, I will look at the impact of global cities on people's everyday lives and then, I’ll analyse the future of the politic leads by the global cities about the people’s living conditions (cet extrait n'a aucun sens).

Firstly, /the/ global cities have real impacts positive as well as negative (ordre des mots) on the population of everyday lives.
At first, the positive aspects of a global city are numerous. The inhabitants have access to numerous services. Indeed, the strong economic developments that know the global cities allow these cities to invest in diverse infrastructures. Equally, the access to culture is another major positive aspect of the global cities. A lot of foreigners come from all over the world to work or to study, enriching them with new languages and cultures. Global Cities propose(autre verbe) also (mal placé) a high quality of education on account of their world-class universities.

However, the growth of urban concentrations and overcrowding has given rise to a number of issues over the years. For that matter, the cities are increasingly dirty with no greenery. They have caused numerous congestions(autre mot) in transports and life in the metropolis is also pretty expensive. But the most problematic drawback is the air pollution of the air, particularly in the center of these cities.
For instance, during the Great Smog due to the factories pollution in 1952, was a severe air pollution event that affected London during December 1952. The inhabitants of London knew(autre verbe) health problems because of the unbreathable sight (unbreathable sight n'a aucun sens). It is considered as the biggest air pollution event in the history of the United Kingdom.

Secondly, the global cities are aware of their weaknesses. That’s why they have managed to lead a future politic, which will be beneficial for our society in general. The current and the future objective of the global cities is to reduce the negative aspects of the globalisation to improve the quality of urban living conditions xxx (préposition manquante) its inhabitants. To make it become possible, Global cities develops (present perfect) also (mal placé) a special politic: the sustainable development. The goal of this politic is to make economic growth and environmental protection go hand in hand. All these ambitions explain the strict legislation of Singapore, which managed to return the almost non-existent criminality.



Réponse: Spaces and exchanges/Aide de dixoeufs, postée le 27-12-2014 à 13:26:11 (S | E)
Bonjour à tous!

Merci beaucoup pour votre aide! J'ai pris en considération toutes vos remarques et ai rédigé à nouveau ma notion. Pouvez-vous me dire si cette nouvelle version est correcte, s'il-vous-plait?


I’m going to talk about global cities in order to illustrate the notion: spaces and exchanges. The concept of space corresponds to geographic locations that have some influence on the world. An exchange is an act of giving and receiving something else in return. We must now apply these definitions to the world system. A global city is a city having a strategic position in diverse domains, mainly economic, political and cultural at the world level and establishing a concentration of communications, because of globalization.
How can global cities, as geographical spaces, have an impact on people’s lives?
First of all, I will look at the impact of global cities on people’s everyday lives and then, I’ll analyse the future of the current policy leads by the global cities.

Firstly, global cities have real positive as well as negative impacts on the population of everyday lives.
At first, the positive aspects of a global city are numerous. The inhabitants have access to numerous services. Indeed, the strong economic development that knows the global cities allow these cities to invest in diverse infrastructures. Equally, the access to culture is another major positive aspect of the global cities. A lot of foreigners come from all over the world to work or to study enriching them with new languages and cultures. Global Cities also offer a high quality of education on account of their world-class universities.
However, the growth of urban concentrations and overcrowding has given rise to a number of issues over the years. For that matter, the cities are increasingly dirty with no greenery. They have caused numerous traffic jams in transports and life in the metropolis is also pretty expensive. But the most problematic drawback is the pollution of the air, particularly in the center of these cities.
For instance, the Great Smog due to the factories pollution, was a severe air pollution event that affected London during December. The inhabitants of London have been victims of health problems because of the unbreathable air. It is considered as the biggest air pollution event in the history of the United Kingdom.
Secondly, the global cities are aware of their weaknesses. That’s why they have managed to lead a future politic, which will be beneficial for our society in general. The current and the future objective of the global cities is to reduce the negative aspects of globalisation to improve the quality of urban living conditions of its inhabitants. To make it possible, Global cities have also developed a special politic: sustainable development. The goal of this politic is to make economic growth and environmental protection go hand in hand. All these ambitions explain the strict legislation of Singapore, which managed to return the almost non-existent criminality.
While for instance, Singapore can be considered as “a perfect society” where everything is orderly, clean and efficient, on account of its strict legislation, it’s nevertheless a fact that people’s personal freedoms are surrendered. That’s why this kind of politic is a source of proceedings.
We can also speak about London politic as example. In fact, many projects like the BedZED project may lead the way towards the sustainable cities of the future. One could also look at many programmes in operation in OECD urban areas to improve transport as part of a drive to make urban living conditions healthier and more environmentally friendly.

To conclude, global cities, like London or Singapore, have a real impact on people and on exchanges. The impacts of these cities, marked by a dense and a merging people from different countries can be as well positive as negative. The growth of global cities seems to continue in the view of the future objectives of global cities. In my opinion, I think the model of global cities isn’t a good thing, humanly talked. Our generation is at an experimental stage to find solutions to answer the many futures objectives of global cities. However, we don’t know the time it’ll take to find revolutionary ideas. Maybe, it’ll be too late. So, should we try hard to improve this model, or should we find an other way of order the world economy and exchanges?

Merci d'avance!



Réponse: Spaces and exchanges/Aide de yaya18, postée le 27-12-2014 à 15:03:18 (S | E)
Re bonjour,
Tu n'as pas tenu compte de mes remarques, "also" est toujours mal placé dans beaucoup de phrases.
"Influence" n'est toujours pas mis au pluriel.
Fais plus attention aux corrections que l'on te donne.
See you

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 27-12-2014 15:14

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 27-12-2014 21:07
merci de ne pas rajouter de fautes.



Réponse: Spaces and exchanges/Aide de california, postée le 27-12-2014 à 19:48:27 (S | E)
Hello
Pourquoi dis-tu que 'having' est mal conjugué, j'ai du mal à te suivre.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 27-12-2014 21:09
Having est correct.



Réponse: Spaces and exchanges/Aide de yaya18, postée le 27-12-2014 à 22:46:28 (S | E)
Hello
Désolé j'ai fait une faute, "having" était bien juste.
PS : Les 2 autres fautes ne le sont pas, je ne me suis pas trompé là-dessus.
Have a good night




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