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Correction /exposé

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Correction /exposé
Message de eliemctyne posté le 22-02-2011 à 17:26:24 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
Je me permets de re-poster mon exposé sur ce forum.
Je suppose qu'il doit comprendre de nombreuses fautes. J'ai rédigé/construit toutes les phrases à l'aide des expressions que je connaissais déjà. Il est possible que je les aie utilisées à mauvais escient, mais n'est-il pas important d'essayer de ré-exploiter nos propres connaissances afin de bien les intégrer et pouvoir les ré-utiliser de manière judicieuse.
Quant à ce que je ne connaissais pas, j'ai cherché dans mon dictionnaire bilingue.
Si quelqu'un voulait donc prendre la peine de me relire et de m'expliquer mes erreurs.Merci beaucoup.
Cordialement.

I have choose to talk about this little notebook.
He is full of good memories of the end of the last year.
I was in a special class called "European section" for 2 hours in the week.
We were 4 students and we have 2 specials teachers.
They teached us german and mathematik in german.
Since we were on very good terms, one of our professor wanted to organize a travel.
We would have to go to Berlin, but the principal doesn't agree.
As the scholastic year was off, we decided to go to an exposition of a german artist : Paul Klee between 2 proofs of the "bac", instead of going to Berlin.
We took the TGV to Paris and spend the whole day in the capital.
With my 3 friends we have prepared some surprises for our teachers.
We have made 2 cups, on them were photos that we took the last day of school and on the back of printed photos we wrote gratful acknowledgments for the 3 last years that we passed in lyceum.
As we were eating on the foot of the Eiffel Tower, we give them our presents.
But one of our teacher has too presents for us.
And this notebook is the present that she gave us.
That's why he is precious to me.
He reminds me my friends, the good times in lyceum, my great teacher and this special day in Paris.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 22-02-2011 19:27

titre + corrections



Réponse: Correction /exposé de peet370, postée le 22-02-2011 à 19:24:51 (S | E)

Bonsoir Eliemctyne,

I have choose to talk about this little notebook.
He (Il ne s'agit pas d'un humain mais d'une chose, d'un objet) is full of good memories of the end of the last year.
I was in a special class called 'European section' for 2 hours in the week.
We were 4 students and we have (Il faut peut être mettre ce verbe au passé ?) 2 specials teachers.
They teached us german and mathematik in german.
Since we were on very good terms, one of our professor wanted to organize a travel.
We would have to go to Berlin, but the principal doesn't agree.
As the scholastic year was off, we decided to go to an exposition of a german artist : Paul Klee between 2 proofs of the 'bac', instead of going to Berlin.
We took the TGV to Paris and spend the whole day in the capital.
With my 3 friends we have prepared some surprises for our teachers.
We have made 2 cups, on them these ones (C'est offert) there were photos (that) we took the last day of school and on the back of printed photos we wrote gratful acknowledgments for the 3 last years (that) we passed in lyceum.
As we were eating on the foot of the Eiffel Tower, we give them our presents.
But one of our teacher has too presents for us.
And this notebook is the present (that) she gave us.
That's why he is precious to me.
He reminds (Ne faut-il pas le mettre aussi au passé ?) me my friends, the good times in lyceum, my great teacher and this special day in Paris.


Cordialement
Peet370





Réponse: Correction /exposé de eliemctyne, postée le 22-02-2011 à 20:28:56 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup Peet370.
Je viens de finir la correction, je pense avoir compris mes fautes et les avoir bien corrigées. Il n'y a que le "instead ..." qui me pose problème. Dans mon dictionnaire il est suivi soit de "of" pour "au lieu de", soit de rien pour "au lieu". Ici je pensais "au lieu d'aller à Berlin", je dois quand même enlever le "of" ? Je ne suis pas non plus sûre pour mes conjugaisons au passé.
Merci encore d'avoir pris le temps de me corriger.

I have choose to talk about this little notebook.
It is full of good memories of the end of the last year.
I was in a special class called 'European section' for 2 hours per week.
We were 4 students and we had 2 special teachers.
They teached us German and Mathematic in german.
Since we were on very good terms, one of our professor wanted to organize a travel.
We would have to go to Berlin, but the principal didn't agree.
As the scholastic year was off, we decided to go to an exposition of a german artist : Paul Klee between 2 proofs of the 'bac', instead (of) going to Berlin.
We took the TGV to Paris and spend the whole day in the capital.
With my 3 friends we have prepared some surprises for our teachers.
We have made 2 cups, on these ones there were photos (that) we took the last day of school and on the back of printed photos we wrote grateful acknowledgments for the 3 last years (that) we passed in lyceum.
As we were eating at the foot of the Eiffel Tower, we give their our presents.
But one of our teacher has too presents for us.
And this notebook is the present (that) she gave us.
That's why it is precious to me.
It reminded me my friends, the good times in lyceum, my great teacher and this special day in Paris.




Réponse: Correction /exposé de notrepere, postée le 22-02-2011 à 23:21:38 (S | E)
Hello

I have choose [mal formé: present perfect] to talk about this little notebook.
We [There] were 4 students and we had 2 special teachers.
They teached [mal formé; ce mot n'existe pas] us German and Mathematic in german.
Since we were on very good terms, one of our professor [one of ... le nom qui suit toujours au pluriel] wanted to organize a travel [un autre mot].
We would have to go [maladroit] to Berlin, but the principal didn't agree.
As the scholastic year was off [il ne va pas], we decided to go to an exposition of a german artist : Paul Klee between 2 proofs of the 'bac', instead of going to Berlin.
We took the TGV to Paris and spend [forme passée] the whole day in the capital.
With my 3 friends we have prepared some surprises for our teachers.
We have made 2 cups, on these ones there were photos (that) we took the last day of school and on the back of printed photos we wrote grateful acknowledgments for the 3 last years (that) we passed in lyceum.
As we were eating at the foot of the Eiffel Tower, we give [passé] their them [tout à fait correct] our presents.
But one of our teacher [le nom 'teacher' au pluriel] has [au passé] too [mal placé: mettez à la fin de la phrase] presents for us.
And this notebook is the present (that) she gave us.
That's why it is precious to me.
It reminded me of my friends, the good times in lyceum, my great teacher and this special day in Paris.

Cordialement


-------------------
Modifié par notrepere le 22-02-2011 23:22





Réponse: Correction /exposé de eliemctyne, postée le 23-02-2011 à 01:18:06 (S | E)
Bonsoir,
Merci de pour vos réponses J'ai corrigé mon brouillon et ça m'aura aidé pour la préparation de mon oral. Comme je le passe demain je ne pense pas que j'aurais le temps de revenir voir si j'ai refait des erreurs. Mais je vous la poste quand même pour qu'elle me serve a posteriori. J'ai de gros doutes quant à ma correction du "nous aurions dû aller ".

I have choosen to talk about this little notebook.
It is full of good memories of the end of the last year.
I was in a special class called 'European section' for 2 hours per week.
There were 4 students and we had 2 special teachers.
They taught us German and Mathematic in German.
Since we were on very good terms, one of our professors wanted to organize a trip.
We had to go to Berlin, but the principal didn't agree.
As the scholastic year was ended, we decided to go to an exposition of a German artist : Paul Klee between 2 proofs of the 'bac', instead of going to Berlin.
We took the TGV to Paris and spent the whole day in the capital.
With my 3 friends we have prepared some surprises for our teachers.
We have made 2 cups, on these ones there were photos (that) we took the last day of school and on the back of printed photos we wrote grateful acknowledgments for the 3 last years (that) we passed in lyceum.
As we were eating at the foot of the Eiffel Tower, we gave them our presents.
But one of our teachers had presents for us too.
And this notebook is the present (that) she gave us.
That's why it is precious to me.
It reminded me of my friends, the good times in lyceum, my great teacher and this special day in Paris.

Cordialement.



Réponse: Correction /exposé de notrepere, postée le 23-02-2011 à 05:56:08 (S | E)
Hello

Presque parfait...

I have choosen to talk about this little notebook.
They taught us German and Mathematic [pluriel; on peut dire 'Maths' aussi] in German.
Since we were on very good terms, one of our professors wanted to organize a trip.
We had [voulez-vous dire: wanted?] to go to Berlin, but the principal didn't agree.
With my 3 friends we have prepared [je suggère le prétérit et pas le present perfect] some surprises for our teachers.
We have made [prétérit] 2 cups, on these ones (1) there were photos (that) we took the last day of school and on the back of the printed photos we wrote grateful acknowledgments (2) for the 3 last years (that) we passed (3) in lyceum.
As (4) we were eating at the foot of the Eiffel Tower, we gave them our presents.

(1) maladroit, par exemple: We made two cups: on one there were pictures and on the other were ...
(2) maladroit, par exemple: notez bien la différence entre 'grateful' et 'gratitude'. acknowledgments of gratitude
(3) le verbe 'passer' ne se traduit pas comme 'pass' en ce cas.
Elle a passé la journée à ne rien faire. She spent the day doing nothing.



Réponse: Correction /exposé de eliemctyne, postée le 23-02-2011 à 14:21:03 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup pour votre aide, je pense m'en être bien sortie. Et ma résolution des vacances va être de m'atteler à la conjugaison!
Encore merci.




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