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Histoire de l'ampoule/correction (1)

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Histoire de l'ampoule/correction
Message de gweg posté le 23-04-2009 à 17:02:12 (S | E | F)

Hi all :p

voilà je suis en ingénieur et l'anglais est ma LV1 mais mon niveau est assez mauvais. Je dois faire un petit exposé sur l'ampoule électrique. Je me suis occupé de la partie "histoire de l'invention" et j'aurais besoin d'un petit coup de main quant aux fautes de grammaire genre les prépositions après certains verbes parfois j'ai du mal, voir surtout si il n'y a pas d'erreur grosses comme des maisons et aussi voir si on comprends ce que je veux dire.
Nous sommes censé tenir 3minutes ce qui explique la longueur relative du texte o_O

Our groups talks about light bulbs. For my part, I would like to present you the story of the electric lamp in its beginning. I will shortly explain how this invention has changed the way we live.
Everyone has already noticed the importance of a light bulb when a power failure occurs or the advantages of an electric torch.
In the Middle Ages, people lighted up with candles, lanterns and burning torches. Towards the 16th century, oil lamps appeared. An observation period started in the next century in which we learnt to create static electricity. A few decades later, Alessandro Volta discovered the electric battery.
In the early eighteen century, British Humphry Davy prodigiously created the very first incandescent light arc by passing a current trough a thin strip of platinum in a vacuum tube. Davy used a better version of the electric battery to supply energy to his lamp. The phenomenon didn't last long. It was impressive but the light wasn't bright enough to be practical.
In eighteen thirty-five, James Lindsay demonstrated a constant electric light at a public meeting in Scotland. James said he could read a book at a distance of more than one foot. However he was completely satisfied by his own device and stopped to improve it.
In eighteen forty, scientist Warren De La Rue increased longevity of the lighting. He used a coiled filament in a vaccum tube enclosure. Although an efficient design, the cost of the platinum was expensive for a commercial use...
During the next decades, many progresses were maid : carbon filament appeared, better vacuum pumps were available and an adequat supply of electricity was possible. A lot of researchers patented their light bulb but no one was able to market the product. Lamp bulbs still remained experimental.
English physicist Sir Joseph Swan found a better carbon filament and he succeeded in avoiding bulb blackening. He will market his own bulb light shortly after.
In eighteen seventy-eight in North America, Thomas Edison began serious researches into developing a practical incandescent lamp. The longevity of the bulb passed quickly from thirteen to fourty hours. Edison and his team discovered that a carbonized bamboo filament could last over a thousand hours !!

Edison company sold the first incandescent light bulb. Others electricity companies followed the tendency in the United States because the potential market was huge. In eighteen ninety, the European capitals beginning to install electric lighting for public and private uses. Big companies sold more and more light bulbs through the world. Electric lamps will gradually replace oil and gas lamp during the twentieth century. Then, inudtrials will produce a more natural light. They will try to keep a lower energy consumption. Tungsten filament will massively distribute...
Today, the incandescent electric bulb can be found almost anywhere. A simple movement of fingers permit to illuminate an entire room. And this to our great satisfaction !


Merci d'avance à ceux qui auront le courage de m'aider, même un peu, je vous en serait grandement reconnaissant :-)

-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 23-04-2009 17:18


Réponse: Histoire de l'ampoule/correction de laure95, postée le 25-04-2009 à 18:55:20 (S | E)
Bonsoir, voici ce que tu dois corriger:
Our groups talks (is going to talk) about light bulbs. For my part, I would like to present you the story of the electric lamp in its beginning. I will shortly explain how this invention has changed the way we live (our way of life).
Everyone has already noticed the importance of a light bulb when a power failure occurs or the advantages of an electric torch.
In the Middle Ages, people lighted up with candles, lanterns and burning torches. Towards the 16th century, oil lamps appeared. An observation period started in the next century in which we learnt to create static electricity. A few decades later, Alessandro Volta discovered the electric battery.
In the early eighteenth century, British Humphry Davy prodigiously created the very first incandescent light arc by passing a current trough (orthographe) a thin strip of platinum in a vacuum tube. Davy used a better version of the electric battery to supply energy to his lamp. The phenomenon didn't last long. It was impressive but the light wasn't bright enough to be practical.
In eighteen thirty-five (en chiffres), James Lindsay demonstrated a constant electric light at a public meeting in Scotland. James said he could read a book at a distance of more than one foot. However he was completely satisfied by his own device and stopped to improve it.
In eighteen forty, the scientist Warren De La Rue increased the longevity of the lighting. He used a coiled filament in a vaccum tube enclosure. Although (despite) an efficient design, the cost of the platinum was expensive for a commercial use...
During the next decades, many progresses were maid : the carbon filament appeared, better vacuum pumps were available and an adequat (orthographe) supply of electricity was possible. A lot of researchers patented their light bulb but no one was able to market the product. Lamp bulbs still remained experimental.
English physicist Sir Joseph Swan found a better carbon filament and he succeeded in avoiding bulb blackening. He will (concordance des temps) market his own bulb light shortly after.
In eighteen seventy-eight in North America, Thomas Edison began serious researches into developing a practical incandescent lamp. The longevity of the bulb passed quickly from thirteen to fourty hours. Edison and his team discovered that a carbonized bamboo filament could last over a thousand hours !!

Edison company sold the first incandescent light bulb. Others electricity companies followed the (that) tendency in the United States because the potential market was huge. In eighteen ninety, the European capitals beginning (temps?) to install electric lighting for public and private uses. Big companies sold more and more light bulbs through the world. Electric lamps will gradually replace oil and gas lamp during the twentieth century. Then, inudtrials will produce a more natural light. They will try to keep a lower energy consumption. Tungsten filament will massively distribute...
Today, the incandescent electric bulb can be found almost anywhere. A simple movement of fingers permit to illuminate an entire room. And this to our great satisfaction !





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