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Bac/Spaces and Exchanges

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Bac/Spaces and Exchanges
Message de swokz posté le 27-04-2019 à 23:31:02 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
Pouvez-vous corriger ce texte svp s'il vous plait ?
Merci pour votre aide.

Im going to talk about the notion Spaces and Exchanges. To begin with, I'd like to give a definition of spaces and exchanges. The differents spaces of the world are nowadays more and more connected to each other spaces. Exchanges, an act of giving one thing and receiving another can take several forms : economic , cultural , human . In class we studied the movement of Brithis people across different borders and their reasons of travelling. So we can ask ourselves why British people like travelling so much ? In my first part we gonna talk about Royal Family and in my second part of British explorers and in my third part the young people today who like to explore.

I] Royal Family
First of all, Royal Family has always been involved in expedition. In old time, Royal Family want to conquer and discover unknow territories to add to their empire.
Moreover,today its not same than old time. But Prince William and Harry follow their ancestor footsetps, and continue to travel but this time for raise money for charity programs and for good causes. => That give a good vision of royal family .

II]In a second time.We go talk about British explorers
A] The first Briton to ski solo across Antartica
Felicity Aston is a women who have skied across the continent alone and withtout kits or helps.
She spent 59 night in this travel and 1084 miles pulling 2 heavy sledges.She was awarded the Queen's Polar Medal in 2015.
She met 2 australians people, she was happy to see them because she cross Antarctica alone with extreme conditions. That must have given her courage to continue her adventure. It was an unexpected meeting in an isolated place.

B) Ranulph Fiennes
Ranulph Fiennes Is a famous british explorer who is delivering a speech for his new expedition: it rely in crossing the Antarctica in the winter
He defends the cause of the blind "Seing is Believing". He raise money to help blindness people, its a useful and worthwhile cause.
But lots of difficulties in this travel: very cold and extreme weather ( minus 70 degree), its a hostile environnement. A real risk in the expedition.

III] Young people of today who like to explore
A Text : Passion for travel:
Before, only wealthy students could take a gap year, now everyone can do this.
Young people want to acquire a new experience , discover new language, new country , new espaces. And they like to sharing photos in social network of this new culture.

To put it in a nutshell, British people like travel because they want to discover new spaces, new country with different languages for example. Travel is rooted in Britain traditions. Its a pilar , a fondation of this nation. Moreover we can see royal family follow footsetps of ancestor in lot of country for help association and raise fund. And don't forget young british people, they also travel for a gap year and explore new espaces !

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 28-04-2019 09:29


Réponse : Bac/Spaces and Exchanges de gerondif, postée le 29-04-2019 à 14:13:19 (S | E)
Bonjour
erreurs en bleu
Im(I'm) going to talk about the notion Spaces and Exchanges. To begin with, I'd like to give a definition of spaces and exchanges. The differents spaces of the world are nowadays more and more connected to each other spaces. Exchanges, an act of giving one thing and receiving another can take several forms : economic , cultural , human . In class we studied the movement of Brithis people across different borders and their reasons of for travelling. So we can ask ourselves why British people like travelling so much ? In my first part we gonna(euh,mettez la formule normale) talk about the Royal Family and in my second part of about British explorers and in my third part about the young people today who like to explore (mettez un cod).

I] The Royal Family
First of all, the Royal Family has always been involved in expedition(pluriel). In the old days time, the Royal Family want(prétérit) to conquer and discover unknow(participe passé) territories to add to their empire.
Moreover,today its not same than old time(verbe, comparatif, expression à revoir). But Prince William and Harry follow their ancestors' footsetps, and continue to travel but this time for(mauvais choix pour dire pour +verbe, notion de but) raise money for charity programs and for good causes. => That give(le s du présent !!) a good vision of the royal family .

II]In a second time (ne se dit guère).We go (présent en ING, futur proche) talk about British explorers
A] The first Briton to ski solo across Antartica
Felicity Aston is a women who have skied across the continent alone and withtout kits or helps.
She spent 59 night(59 ! autant mettre un s!) in this travel and (spent ne va pas pour la distance)1,084 miles pulling 2 heavy sledges.She was awarded the Queen's Polar Medal in 2015.
She met 2 australians(adjectif invariable) people, she was happy to see them because she cross(prétérit) Antarctica alone with extreme conditions. That must have given her courage to continue her adventure. It was an unexpected meeting in an isolated place.

B) Ranulph Fiennes
Ranulph Fiennes is a famous British explorer who is delivering a speech for his new expedition: it rely(à conjuguer + sans doute mauvais verbe confusion avec to relate ?) in crossing the Antarctica in the winter (on pourrait dire it concicted in crossing mais to relate relater, raconter, n'a pas besoin de in, he relates his crossing... to rely on = dépendre de))
He defends the cause of the blind "Seing is Believing". He raise(le s du présent) money to help blindness people (soit to fight blindness, soit to help blind people, to help the blind), its(orth) a useful and worthwhile cause.
But lots of difficulties in this travel (pas de verbe dans cette "phrase"): very cold and extreme weather ( minus 70 degrees), its a hostile environnement. A real risk in the expedition.

III] Young people of today who like to explore
A Text : Passion for travel:
Before, only wealthy students could take a gap year, now everyone can do this(this annonce ce qui va suivre, that reprend ce qui précède).
Young people want to acquire a new experience , discover new languages, new country (pluriel), new espaces(mot français). And they like to(à ôter) sharing photos in social network(pluriel) of this new culture.

To put it in a nutshell, British people like travel (soit travels au pluriel, le nom, soit la fait de voyager, le gérondif du verbe travel)because they want to discover new spaces, new country(pluriel) with different languages for example(vous vous répétez). Travel is rooted in Britain(adjectif) traditions. Its a pillar , a fondation(foundation) of this nation. Moreover we can see the royal family follow footsetps of ancestor(inversez + cas possessif + orth de footsteps, a step, un pas) in a lot of country(pluriel) for(mauvais choix de "pour") help association and raise fund. And don't forget young british people, they also travel for a gap year and explore new espaces(mot français) !




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