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Aide/le pire jour
Message de deathcar posté le 09-01-2012 à 21:01:41 (S | E | F)
Bonjour
Je viens de faire mon DM d'anglais, je devais raconter le pire jour de ma vie (par exemple une honte ou une accumulation de malchances) en 300 mots.
Je poste mon DM ici car j'ai l'impression d'avoir fait plusieurs fautes de temps etc... et vu que je suis en L les exigences sont plus élevées !
Donc si vous pouviez me dire où se trouvent mes fautes, ce serait gentil
Merci pour vos réponses.
Voilà le DM :
1st January 2012. 08:51p.m.
Goddamn. Every time you have a good time, something comes to waste that. Yesterday, i was with my best friend and i had a really good time. We listened to music all the night. It is from 4am that things started to change. I don’t know why, but every things strated to fall on me, there was a buildup. « Your usually bad luck follows you » I told myself. I always pass from one extrem to the other. So, at 4am, i vomited. Of course, I was not in my home. I thought that i didn’t fully digested the squeegee of the previous day. After that, we went to bed. Obviously,the upstairs neighbors were partying. The music was very loud. We listened to that horrible music for a long time. Only two hours after they decided to stop the music, and during all this time i was stil feeling sick. We finally slept. At 6am. 4 hours later, my mother calls me to wake me up. « Dress up, we go to your grandparents right now » she said. It tooks me 5 secondes to realize what she was asking me. « I hope you slept well, because we go to celebrate your sister’s birthday. There will be everyone » she added. Hm. For god’s sake, I can’t believe it. I slept for 4 hours, i was steel feeling sick, and my mother asked me to wake up to one hour’s drive. These things happen only to me. 1st of January is definitely cursed. We must bannish this day of the calendar. It was officially a day of horror.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 09-01-2012 23:04
Message de deathcar posté le 09-01-2012 à 21:01:41 (S | E | F)
Bonjour

Je viens de faire mon DM d'anglais, je devais raconter le pire jour de ma vie (par exemple une honte ou une accumulation de malchances) en 300 mots.
Je poste mon DM ici car j'ai l'impression d'avoir fait plusieurs fautes de temps etc... et vu que je suis en L les exigences sont plus élevées !
Donc si vous pouviez me dire où se trouvent mes fautes, ce serait gentil

Merci pour vos réponses.
Voilà le DM :
1st January 2012. 08:51p.m.
Goddamn. Every time you have a good time, something comes to waste that. Yesterday, i was with my best friend and i had a really good time. We listened to music all the night. It is from 4am that things started to change. I don’t know why, but every things strated to fall on me, there was a buildup. « Your usually bad luck follows you » I told myself. I always pass from one extrem to the other. So, at 4am, i vomited. Of course, I was not in my home. I thought that i didn’t fully digested the squeegee of the previous day. After that, we went to bed. Obviously,the upstairs neighbors were partying. The music was very loud. We listened to that horrible music for a long time. Only two hours after they decided to stop the music, and during all this time i was stil feeling sick. We finally slept. At 6am. 4 hours later, my mother calls me to wake me up. « Dress up, we go to your grandparents right now » she said. It tooks me 5 secondes to realize what she was asking me. « I hope you slept well, because we go to celebrate your sister’s birthday. There will be everyone » she added. Hm. For god’s sake, I can’t believe it. I slept for 4 hours, i was steel feeling sick, and my mother asked me to wake up to one hour’s drive. These things happen only to me. 1st of January is definitely cursed. We must bannish this day of the calendar. It was officially a day of horror.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 09-01-2012 23:04
Réponse: Aide/le pire jour de notrepere, postée le 10-01-2012 à 03:18:11 (S | E)

Goddamn (1). Every time you have (2) a good time, something comes along to waste (3) that (4). Yesterday, i was with my best friend and i had (2) a really good time. We listened (2) to music all the night. It is (6) from (7) 4am that things started to change. I don’t know why, but every things



I thought that i didn’t fully digested the squeegee (8)





en rouge = inutile
(1) Goddammit.
(2) forme continue
(3) pas le meilleur verbe
(4) 'it' me semble mieux
(5) toujours en majuscule 'I'
(6) au passé
(7) 'at' vaut mieux
(8) Vous avez mangé une raclette, hein?


(9) On dirait: Get dressed!
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Modifié par notrepere le 10-01-2012 08:06
Good idea, nobody.
Réponse: Aide/le pire jour de nobody, postée le 10-01-2012 à 07:51:51 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Au sujet de la raclette, en anglais se dit bien : a raclette. (plat au fromage).
Bonne continuation
nobody
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