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SOS/ oral Bac

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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SOS/ oral Bac
Message de smm posté le 01-04-2018 à 14:50:31 (S | E | F)
Hey
j'ai besoin d'aide pour mon Bac d'anglais qui se déroulera très prochainememt.J'ai récité ce que j'ai fait ci-dessous lors de mon Bac blanc mais j'ai eu une mauvaise note. Apparemment je ne respecterais pas le thème "notion of progress" Qu'en pensez-vous s'il vous plait????
Merci pour votre aide.

Miss independent, Single lady, Respect by Aretha Franklin are powerful songs about working women, resourceful and emancipated ones. If these songs are successful today, they would be just an utopian and impossible vision of woman in an other time. In order to illustrate the notion of progress, i decided to talk about the condition of the woman and attempt to answer the question: to what extend the portrayal of the women has evolved?

Firstly, women were dominated by a male society. Taming of the shrew, a play written by Shakespeare raises the point of that gender inequality. The play is about Katharina a woman with strong personality who became gradually tamed by her husband. in this extract, Katharina who illustrate the society’s point of view explain the role of a wife. According to them a woman is weak and necessarily need a man in order to protect her. That’s why only men are allowed to work. As a consequence, women are economically independent and couldn’t succeed in have a career or a social life if she is not married. Marriage become a necessity. Moreover, Women have several duties such as obedience, submission and taking care of the home. She has to serve her husband and be grateful toward him. We can see how difficult the situation of women was at the 16th century.

Secondly, few centuries later in 20th century, the role of women changed. My second document is an american propaganda created in 1943 in ,order to encourage women to work. It represents an Iconic figure of a strong female war production worker. The woman in the poster is beautiful, feminine and she is wearing makeup .. On Top of that,Her arms look strong and her face really determined. For these reasons, we can say that this poster shows that woman are as capable as men are. Consequently,during second great war,the stereotype of a weak woman changed. Women started to work in munition factories and the number of female worker increased. It was a cultrip.. WWII was a culprit and a starting point of a process of independence for woman. To illustrate how strong this poster is, I can say that leading figures such as hillary clinton or beyonce re-appropriated it to promote feminism. Here we can say that there is a progress because women situation has reached a better stage.
However, we can notice that even today women are under pressure of the society.My second document is a short film made by an norway NGO and it is titled dear daddy.The video is about a girl’s life from her birth to adulthood. It is narrated by a girl who is not born yet and she warns her father about what will happen to her. She wants to draw or attention about boys behaviours toward girls. Actually She raises the problem of those little inappropriate jokes and injuries that male tennagers say to girls which can lead to sexual assault or harassments.As far as I’m concerned, I think that we ‘trivialize too much this sexist jokes and expressions although they have big consequences in a woman’s confident and self esteem.

So to recap, i’d like to say that women condition has evolved through centuries. If they were expected to be obedient, and considered as weak. Today women are powerful and has prove that they are as capable as men in the world of labor and can take care of themselves. However there are still progress to make in gender inequalities. And i strongly believe that men have to take part of this fight too. We can link theses documents to seats and forms of power were men play a key role.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 01-04-2018 16:11


Réponse : SOS/ oral Bac de dsmith, postée le 02-04-2018 à 04:27:37 (S | E)
Bonjour,

Miss independent, Single lady, (liste "et" )Respect by Aretha Franklin are powerful songs about working women, resourceful and emancipated ones. If these songs are successful today, they would be just an (utopia has the "you" sound so "a" Lien internet
)
utopian and impossible vision of woman (pluriel) in an other (un seul mot another) time. In order to illustrate the notion of progress, i (majuscule) decided to talk about the condition of the woman (pas "the" et pluriel "women") and attempt to answer the question: to what extend (orthographe Lien internet
) the portrayal of the women has evolved?(pour poser une question...il faut mettre "has" avant "the portrayal")


Firstly, women were dominated by a male society. The Taming of the shrew (majuscule pour un titre), a play written by Shakespeare raises the point of that gender inequality. The play is about Katharina a woman with a strong personality who became gradually (inverser ces deux mots) tamed by her husband. in this extract, Katharina who illustrate the society’s point of view explain (mauvaise conjugation) the role of a wife. According to them a woman is weak and necessarily need (mauvaise conjugation...singulier...a woman) a man in order to protect her. That’s why only men are allowed to work. As a consequence, women are economically independent (they are "dependent") and couldn’t succeed in have (in verb+ing) a career or a social life if she is (past tense) not married. Marriage become a necessity. Moreover, Women have several duties such as obedience, submission and taking care of the home. She has to serve her husband and be grateful toward him. We can see how difficult the situation of women was at (in) the 16th century.

Secondly, a few centuries later in (definite article) 20th century, the role of women changed. My second document is an american propaganda advertisement created in 1943 in order (mieux: "used") to encourage women to work. It represents an Iconic figure of a strong female war production worker. The woman in the poster is beautiful, feminine and she is wearing makeup .. On Top of that,Her arms look strong and her face really determined. For these reasons, we can say that this poster shows that woman are as capable as men are. Consequently,during (definite article) second great (world) war,the stereotype of a weak woman changed. Women started to work in munition factories and the number of female worker (pluriel) increased. It was a cultrip.. WWII was a culprit (culprit a une sense negative..."the cause" and a starting point of a process of independence for woman. To illustrate how strong this poster is, I can say that leading figures such as hillary clinton or beyonce re-appropriated it to promote feminism. Here we can say that there is a progress because women situation (women's situation...ou mieux "the situation of women") has reached a better stage.

However, we can notice that even today women are under pressure of the (in) society. My second (third??) document is a short film made by an norway (a Norwegian) NGO and it is titled dear daddy.The video is about a girl’s life from her birth to adulthood. It is narrated by a girl who is not born yet and she warns her father about what will happen to her. She wants to draw or attention about (to) boys behaviours (singulier) toward girls. Actually She raises the problem of those little inappropriate jokes and injuries that male tennagers (orth.) say to girls which can lead to sexual assault or harassments.As far as I’m concerned, I think that we ‘trivialize too much this (plural) sexist jokes and expressions although they have big consequences in a woman’s confident (the noun version) and self esteem.

So to recap, i’d like to say that women condition (the condition of women) has evolved through the centuries. If (Before) they were expected to be obedient, and considered as weak, while Today women are powerful and has prove (mauvaise conjugation) that they are as capable as men in the world of labor and can take care of themselves. However there are (singulier) still progress to make in gender inequalities. And i strongly believe that men have to take part of (in) this fight too. We can link theses (orthographe) documents to seats and forms of power were men play a key role.




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