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Let's Suggest/31

Cours gratuits > Forum > Exercices du forum || En bas

[POSTER UNE NOUVELLE REPONSE] [Suivre ce sujet]


Let's Suggest/31
Message de here4u posté le 24-01-2023 à 23:42:03 (S | E | F)
Hello, dear workers!

Here is the new topic for you to write about... I hope many will participate enthusiastically... and that you'll do it as well as previously...

You mustn't be afraid of making mistakes... We LOVE mistakes, because they give us an opportunity to explain and correct!

Here is today's topic,
"Tell us your best memory. (Or a very funny one; )"(130 to 150 words) (No confession is required...
As ever, you have FREEDOM...


Voici le rappel des modalités de la première partie de l'exercice :
1. Je vous demande une EXPRESSION sur le sujet proposé à m’envoyer en mp dès que possible …
2. Le plus tôt possible, cette première expression sera publiée sur le Forum, et CHACUN sera libre de « corriger » UNE FOIS ( en collant le texte et indiquant les erreurs EN BLEU, et en soulignant ce qui vous semble maladroit et que vous voudriez changer, sans donner la « correction » (forme correcte), à ce moment là, comme il se doit.) Si un autre membre a déjà indiqué des erreurs en bleu, VOUS DEVEZ repartir de cette correction et la confirmer ou la corriger ... Un seul devoir à la fois sera publié pour corriger … Vous pourrez ensuite donner vos suggestions de correction (en vert!)

IMPORTANT! Pour me faciliter le transfert de vos travaux sur le site, pourriez vous m'indiquer par un "(" la correction qui s'impose à vous, s'il vous plaît ?
ie. (I'm repeating for years... ou (was not only to want something,... Pourquoi ? Simplement parce que le site ne "garde" pas les indications de couleurs ou de soulignement etc. dès que l'on copie ... Donc, je prends vos travaux, je les corrige avec les codes "bleu" ou "souligné" ou "vert", mais au moment où je vous poste la correction, je perds tout mon travail ... et dois tout refaire mot à mot avec deux fenêtres ou même deux écrans pour un travail fastidieux de copie point par point ... Merci de votre aide !

Les modalités complètes sont accessibles sur le lien suivant :
Lien internet


( Je vous les rappellerai au fur et à mesure de la progression du travail )
Cet exercice sera ... ce que vous en ferez : ou ou ** Do your best, I trust You!
Correction en ligne le mercredi 8 février 2023.
J'attends vos envois en mp et publierai le premier dès que possible.

MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU and with US!




Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de here4u, postée le 27-01-2023 à 10:09:53 (S | E)
Hello, dear friends !

Here's EXPRESSION N°1: Please help, indicating possible mistakes and underlining what looks clumsy...

I have always dreamed of flying like a bird, and in my craziest dreams I saw myself gliding over the mountains.So, you can imagine my happiness,when for my 50th birthday, my friends decided to offer me a flight in para glider.
Of course, it was an accompanied flight in tandem with an instructor.
After a long climb, on foot, to "the Arpette"mountain pasture, where Serge the shepherd kept his folk,we took off and glided for half an hour.
What a magical flight!
What a feeling of calm and freedom I felt, while admiring these magnificent landscapes! As free as birds , we flew over the Tarentaise valley, which I know well from my hikes. Half way down I could see the picturesque village of Montchavin whose chalets looked tiny from above.
But all things come to an end, and we landed in the meadows near Macot.
That was many years ago, but the images and memories are with me for a long time.160words


a lot for your help!



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de maxwell, postée le 27-01-2023 à 20:18:35 (S | E)
Hello!

EXPRESSION 1: Mistakes and clumsiness:
I have always dreamed of flying like a bird, and in my craziest dreams I saw myself gliding over the mountains.So, you can imagine my happiness(,ponctuation when for my 50th birthday, my friends decided to offer me a flight in para glider.
Of course, it was an accompanied flight in tandem with an instructor.
After a long climb, on foot, to "the Arpette"mountain pasture(, ponctuation) where Serge the shepherd kept his folk (folk ? je ne suis pas sûr de comprendre),we took off and glided for half an hour.
What a magical flight!
What a feeling of calm and freedom I felt, while admiring these magnificent landscapes! As free as birds , we flew over the Tarentaise valley(, ponctuation!) which I know well from my hikes. Half way down I could see the picturesque village of Montchavin whose chalets looked tiny from above.
But all things come to an end, and we landed in the meadows near Macot.
That was many years ago, but the images and memories are with me for a long time.

Je connais l'auteur Les espaces ne sont pas au bon endroit (mais aussi, il y a un point commun avec Our story)




Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de maxwell, postée le 29-01-2023 à 15:11:51 (S | E)
Hello!

EXPRESSION 1: suggestions:
I have always (dreamt (1) of flying like a bird, and in my craziest dreams I saw myself gliding over (mountains (2). So you can imagine my happiness when for my 50th birthday, my friends decided to offer me a flight in (paraglider (3).
Of course, it was an accompanied flight in tandem with an instructor.
After a long climb, on foot, to "the Arpette" mountain pasture where Serge the shepherd kept his (flock (4), we took off and glided for half an hour.
What a magical flight!
What a feeling of calm and freedom I felt, while admiring these magnificent landscapes! As free as birds, we flew over the Tarentaise valley (5) which I know well from my hikes. Half way down, I could see the picturesque village of Montchavin whose chalets looked tiny from above.
But all things come to an end, and we landed in the meadows near Macot.
That was many years ago, but the images and memories are with me for a long time.

J'ai remis les espaces aux bons endroits
(1) c'était correct mais dreamt est britannique
(2) les montagnes en général et non certaines montagnes en particulier => pas de the
(3) en un seul mot
(4) je pense qu'il s'agit de l'intention de l'auteur vu les indices (pasture, shepherd au sens de berger et non de pasteur)
(5) après une virgule, le lecteur a tendance à traduire which par 'ce que /ce qui'. Sans la virgule, le lecteur traduira spontanément par 'que/qui', ce qui est le cas ici.



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de amalia80, postée le 29-01-2023 à 16:03:46 (S | E)
HELLO!
je n'ai plus rien à corriger après Maxwell


EXPRESSION 1: suggestions:
I have always (dreamt (1) of flying like a bird, and in my craziest dreams I saw myself gliding over (mountains (2). So you can imagine my happiness when for my 50th birthday, my friends decided to offer me a flight in (paraglider (3).
Of course, it was an accompanied flight in tandem with an instructor.
After a long climb, on foot, to "the Arpette" mountain pasture where Serge the shepherd kept his (flock (4), we took off and glided for half an hour.
What a magical flight!
What a feeling of calm and freedom I felt, while admiring these magnificent landscapes! As free as birds, we flew over the Tarentaise valley which I know well from my hikes. Half way down, I could see the picturesque village of Montchavin whose chalets looked tiny from above.
But all things come to an end, and we landed in the meadows near Macot.
That was many years ago, but the images and memories are with me for a long time.

You got it,Maxwell.It was the shepherd who kept his flock in the pastures.There is a lovely book about him "The shepherd who skied"



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de here4u, postée le 30-01-2023 à 09:47:23 (S | E)
Hello dears,

EXPRESSION N°2: please help, indicating possible mistakes and underlining what looks clumsy...



My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day 8 years ago. My partner and I embarked in Buenos Aires on a boat for a 22- days- cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a 5 -days- voyage and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de Janiero. We got off the boat to do a tour of the city. We had climbed until the top of the rock of Cristo Redentor's statue and here my partner took out a box from his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When the box was opened, a diamond appeared.
In front this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay of the world, mon partner ask me:
Will you marry me?
Crying in the grip of emotion, I answered :YES and we started a family. 136 MOTS

Thanks for your help !



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de amalia80, postée le 30-01-2023 à 12:14:57 (S | E)
Hello dears,

EXPRESSION N°2: indicating possible mistakes and underlining what looks clumsy...

My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day 8 years ago. My partner and I embarked in Buenos aires on a boat for a 22-days - cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a 5 -days-voyage and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de Janiero. We got off the boat to do a tour of the city. We had climbed until the top of the rock of Cristo Redentor's statue and here my partner took out a box from his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When the box was opened, a diamond appeared.
In front this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay of the world, mon partner ask me:
Will you marry me?
Crying in the grip of emotion, I answered :YES and we started a family. 136 MOTS

How romantic it is!It feels like a movie!



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de maxwell, postée le 30-01-2023 à 20:15:19 (S | E)
Hello!
EXPRESSION 2: Mistakes and clumsiness:
My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day 8 years ago. My partner and I embarked in Buenos Aires on a boat for a 22- (days- cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a 5 (-days- voyage and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de Janiero. We got off the boat to (do a tour of the city. We had climbed until the top of the rock of Cristo Redentor's statue (and here my partner took( out a box from his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When the box was opened, a diamond appeared.
(In front this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay (of the world, (mon partner (ask me:
Will you marry me?
Crying in the grip of emotion, I answered :YES and we started a family. 136 MOTS

Belle histoire romantique
Quelques espaces mal positionnés...



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de amalia80, postée le 01-02-2023 à 12:42:50 (S | E)
Hello dears,

EXPRESSION N°2: suggestions...

My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day 8 years ago. My partner and I( boarded a ship in Buenos aires for a 22- day cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a 5 -( day- ( trip and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de Janiero. We got off the boat to( take a tour of the city. We had climbed until the top of the rock of Cristo Redentor's statue and here my partner took( a box out of his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When the box was opened, a diamond appeared.
In front ( of this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay( in the world,(my partner( asked me:
Will you marry me?
Crying( with emotion, I answered :YES and we started a family. 136 MOTS



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de maxwell, postée le 01-02-2023 à 20:41:24 (S | E)
Hello!
EXPRESSION 2: suggestions:
My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day (eight years ago. My partner and I (boarded a boat in Buenos Aires for a 22-(day cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a (five-day trip and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de Janiero. We got off the boat to (tour the city. We had climbed until the top of the rock of Cristo Redentor's statue (when my partner took (a box out of his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When (he opened the box, a diamond appeared.
(In front of this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay (in the world, (my partner (asked me:
"Will you marry me?"
Crying in the grip of emotion, I answered: "YES!" and we started a family. 136 MOTS



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de here4u, postée le 04-02-2023 à 12:01:46 (S | E)
Hello dears,

EXPRESSION N°3 en attente publiée ce soir tard pour laisser à qui le veut la possibilité de faire ses suggestions ...



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de here4u, postée le 04-02-2023 à 22:45:05 (S | E)
Hello, dear writers and readers,

EXPRESSION N°3: please help, indicating possible mistakes and underlining what looks clumsy...

I always smile when I remember the good times I used to have with my dog.
He was hardly three months old when my parents bought him. The first night, he felt alone, he was whining. He didn't want to sleep in his dog basket: we had to let him sleep in my bedroom. He was so attached to us that we could never leave the house without his crying and baying.
I loved playing with him, throwing a tennis ball and seeing him run after it (and keep it for a while before he finally agreed to drop it...)
Whenever we sang, he sang along (or so it seemed...)
He was used to playing with his rug, taking it in his mouth and shaking it. He would never let us take his rug out of his mouth! He would also play with our slippers....
He loved chewing pressed dog bones: he would start growling and baring his teeth whenever we seemed to approach a hand to take his bone. So one day, I imitated him: before giving him a new bone, I (almost) took it in my mouth, I crouched and jealously kept the bone vertically between my hands on the floor; I pretended to chew it and growled when he came closer. He didn't dare to grab it!
Of course, not all my best memories involve my dog but I wanted to share this part of my happiness with you.
(244 W)

Thanks for your help!

As you can see, this EXPRESSION has not respected the limited number of words... The author is "a repeat offender"! Therefore, I have decided to give him a "punishment" or let's say "forfeits"... He'll have the choice between "flogging OR tarring and feathering"... explaining the two punishments to you in 150 words MAXIMUM! Let it be! (in no hurry...) As I'm very cool as a torturer, everybody can help doing the "research" (not before the Follow up Work, to keep everything clear! please !)



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de maxwell, postée le 05-02-2023 à 20:28:45 (S | E)
Hello!

Tarring and feathering is a public punishment where the victim is stripped naked (or stripped to the waist) and poured (or painted) wood tar and thrown feathers on.

Flogging is a punishment where the victim is beaten with a whip like a cat o' nine tails for example.
(48 W)



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de here4u, postée le 05-02-2023 à 23:49:14 (S | E)
Hello!

Quite unexpected! Maxwell seems to like punishments... , which doesn't allow him to write more words than the required number ( + or - 10% ) next time!

Edit: 07/02 : 00h25. I know Max also likes answers to his questions (and he asks many... , some of which are so "personal" that they are difficult to answer... ), but as this will be the addition to the correction of the correction of your corrected tries, it will take me a little time to answer... just because (sorry! ) I have a lot on my plate just now and do all that I can do, when I can do it. Be patient!



New Edition: 07/02 12.00
I've started answering these questions...




Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de amalia80, postée le 06-02-2023 à 17:09:30 (S | E)
Hello, dear writers and readers,

EXPRESSION N°3: indicate possible mistakes and underlining what looks clumsy...

I always smile when I remember the good times I used to have with my dog.
He was hardly three months old when my parents bought him. The first night, he felt alone , he was whining. He didn't want to sleep in his dog basket:x mot de liaison we had to let him sleep in my bedroom. He was so attached to us that we could never leave the house without his crying and baying.
I loved playing with him, throwing a tennis ball and seeing him run after it (and keep it for a while before he finally agreed to drop it...)
Whenever we sang, he sang along (or so it seemed...)
He was used to playing with his rug, taking it in his mouth and shaking it. He would never let us take his rug out of his mouth! He would also play with our slippers....
He loved chewing x pressed dog bones: he would start growling and baring his teeth whenever we seemed to approach a hand to take his bone. So one day, I imitated him: before giving him a new bone, I (almost) took it in my mouth, I crouched x and jealously kept the bone vertically between my hands on the floor; I pretended to chew x it and growled when he came closer. He didn't dare to grab it!
Of course, not all my best memories involve my dog but I wanted to share this part of my happiness with you.
(244 W)
It reminds me of my dog !



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de amalia80, postée le 06-02-2023 à 17:48:51 (S | E)
Hello!
As Maxwell wrote :"Tarring and feathering is a public punishment where the victim is stripped naked (or stripped to the waist)" and coated with tar and feathers.
This torture first appeared in the reign of Richard 1st of England, continued through the centuries, and was exported to the United States.The last use was in 2007 in Ireland!
Wilkipedia gives very precise information about this barbaric torture .
Flogging was a punishment administered whith a whip. A lot of countries have abolished it but it is still used in some parts of the world. 93 words



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de maxwell, postée le 06-02-2023 à 20:30:35 (S | E)
Hello!
He also likes answers (to his questions in the follow-up work (Let's suggest 30) ...



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de here4u, postée le 07-02-2023 à 11:53:20 (S | E)
Hello!

Please, don't be sarcastic... and look at my EDITION of my preceding post : 05/02. 23h49

Je n'ai pas répondu sous ton post car il y en avait un autre qui n'avait rien à voir (et qui a été supprimé par Lucile ! Lucile )



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de lucile83, postée le 07-02-2023 à 13:00:45 (S | E)
You're welcome !



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de here4u, postée le 07-02-2023 à 14:09:24 (S | E)
Hello dears,

High time for green! Come on!



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de amalia80, postée le 07-02-2023 à 14:28:39 (S | E)
Hello, dear writers and readers,

EXPRESSION N°3: suggestions..

I always smile when I remember the good times I used to have with my dog.
He was hardly three months old when my parents bought him. The first night, he felt (lonely , he was whining. He didn't want to sleep in his dog basket ( so we had to let him sleep in my bedroom. He was so attached to us that we could never leave the house without his crying and baying.
I loved playing with him, throwing a tennis ball and seeing him run after it (and keep it for a while before he finally agreed to drop it...)
Whenever we sang, he sang along (or so it seemed...)
He was used to playing with his rug, taking it in his mouth and shaking it. He would never let us take his rug out of his mouth! He would also play with our slippers....
He loved chewing( on pressed dog bones: he would start growling and baring his teeth whenever we seemed to approach a hand to take his bone. So one day, I imitated him: before giving him a new bone, I (almost) took it in my mouth, I crouched ( down and jealously kept the bone vertically between my hands on the floor; I pretended to chew ( on it and growled when he came closer. He didn't dare to grab it!
Of course, not all my best memories involve my dog but I wanted to share this part of my happiness with you. (244 W)



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de here4u, postée le 08-02-2023 à 22:28:28 (S | E)
Hello dear workers and dear readers,

Voici vos EXPRESSIONS - très très bonnes - avec peu d'erreurs, juste quelques " étourderies " ... et encore, vous les avez repérées, et corrigées...

EXPRESSION N°1 : initial text and my preliminary remarks.

I have always dreamed of flying like a bird, and in my craziest dreams I saw myself gliding over the mountains.So, you can imagine my happiness,when for my 50th birthday, my friends decided to offer me a flight in para glider.( espace après virgules et points…)
(Nouveau "paragraphe"?Of course, it was an accompanied flight in tandem with an instructor.
After a long climb, on foot, to "the Arpette"mountain pasture, where Serge the shepherd kept his folk,we took off and glided for half an hour.
What a magical flight!
What a feeling of calm and freedom I felt, while admiring these magnificent landscapes! As free as birds , we flew over the Tarentaise valley, which I know well from my hikes. Half way down I could see the picturesque village of Montchavin whose chalets looked tiny from above.
But all things come to an end, and we landed in the meadows near Macot.
That was many years ago, but the images and memories (are with me for a long time.160words TTB


EXPRESSION 1: indications N°1:

I have always dreamed of flying like a bird, and in my craziest dreams I saw myself gliding over the mountains.So, you can imagine my happiness(,ponctuation when for my 50th birthday, my friends decided to offer me a flight in para glider.
Of course, it was an accompanied flight in tandem with an instructor.B
After a long climb, on foot, to "the Arpette"mountain pasture(, ponctuation) where Serge the shepherd kept his folk (folk ? je ne suis pas sûr de comprendre)[moi non plus… simple confusion de l'ordre des lettres, je pense...],we took off and glided for half an hour.
What a magical flight!
What a feeling of calm and freedom I felt, while admiring these magnificent landscapes! As free as birds , we flew over the Tarentaise valley(, ponctuation!) which I know well from my hikes. Half way down I could see the picturesque village of Montchavin whose chalets looked tiny from above.
But all things come to an end, and we landed in the meadows near Macot.
That was many years ago, but the images and memories( are with me for a long time.

Je connais l'auteur Les espaces ne sont pas au bon endroit (mais aussi, il y a un point commun avec Our story)[There is no real mystery!)

EXPRESSION 1: suggestions 1:

I have always (dreamt (1) of flying like a bird, and in my craziest dreams I saw myself gliding over (mountains (2). So you can imagine my happiness when for my 50th birthday, my friends decided to offer me a flight in (paraglider (3). Of course, it was an accompanied flight in tandem with an instructor.
After a long climb, on foot, to "the Arpette" mountain pasture where Serge the shepherd kept his (flock (4),[YES!] we took off and glided for half an hour.
What a magical flight!
What a feeling of calm and freedom I felt, while admiring these magnificent landscapes! As free as birds, we flew over the Tarentaise valley (5) which I know well from my hikes. Half way down, I could see the picturesque village of Montchavin whose chalets looked tiny from above.
But all things come to an end, and we landed in the meadows near Macot.
That was many years ago, but the images and memories (are with me for a long time.??? TTB

J'ai remis les espaces aux bons endroits
(1) c'était correct mais dreamt est britannique [I like it better, too… but dreamed isn’t a mistake here !]
(2) les montagnes en général et non certaines montagnes en particulier => pas de the ; [Pas d’accord … l’auteur a bien pu penser à ces montagnes précises, parcourues et si bien connues …je laisserais le « the »]
(3) en un seul mot [oui]
(4) je pense qu'il s'agit de l'intention de l'auteur vu les indices (pasture, shepherd au sens de berger et non de pasteur) [It sure is !]
Both herd and flock are used of animals (and usually farm animals) that are domesticated and kept under the care of a person. In this particular use, herd tends to be used of cattle or other bovine animals, and flock tends to be used of sheep and goats.
(5) après une virgule, le lecteur [s’il a de très bonnes connaissances de l’anglais… ] a tendance à traduire which par 'ce que /ce qui'. Sans la virgule, le lecteur traduira spontanément par 'que/qui', ce qui est le cas ici.[Très bien vu... J'avais laissé passer !
Très Bonne correction sur un TBon texte !


EXPRESSION 1: suggestions N°2:

I have always (dreamt (1) of flying like a bird, and in my craziest dreams I saw myself gliding over (THE mountains (2). So you can imagine my happiness when for my 50th birthday, my friends decided to offer me a flight in (paraglider (3).
Of course, it was an accompanied flight in tandem with an instructor.
After a long climb, on foot, to "the Arpette" mountain pasture where Serge the shepherd kept his (flock (4), we took off and glided for half an hour.
What a magical flight!
What a feeling of calm and freedom I felt, while admiring these magnificent landscapes! As free as birds, we flew over the Tarentaise valley which I know well from my hikes. Half way down, I could see the picturesque village of Montchavin whose chalets looked tiny from above.
But all things come to an end, and we landed in the meadows near Macot.
That was many years ago, but the images and memories (are with me for a long time.* That’s a true-to-life story…, which is even better! TTTB

You got it,Maxwell.It was the shepherd who kept his flock in the pastures. There is a lovely book about him "The shepherd who skied"

- Une petite précision : [The sheep are kept in a pen. - If not, the shepherd watches his flock/ holds his sheep together/ looks after/ takes care of/ guards his flock/ ]
* Je ne comprends pas cette dernière phrase ... J'y vois une faute de temps , ou alors je n'y comprends rien - ce qui est possible ! Telle qu'elle est, il faudrait revoir la construction ...

TBon texte et TB correction.


_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

EXPRESSION N°2: initial text and preliminary indications:

My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day 8 years ago. My partner and I XXX embarked in Buenos Aires on a boat for a 22- (days-ARGHHHHHH cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a 5 –(days- voyage and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de (Janiero. We got off the boat to do a tour of the city. We had climbed (until the top of the rock of (Cristo Redentor's statue and here my partner took out a (box from his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When the box was opened, a diamond XXXX appeared.
In front this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay (of the world, mon partner (ask me:
Will you marry me?
Crying in the grip of emotion, I answered : wdYES and we started a family. 136 MOTS TB

EXPRESSION N°2: indications N°1:

My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day 8 years ago.My partner and I embarked in Buenos aires on a boat for a 22-days - cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a 5 -days-voyage and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de (Janiero. We got off the boat to do a tour of the city. We had climbed (until the top of the rock of (Cristo Redentor's statue and here my partner took out a box from his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When the box was opened, a diamond xxxx appeared.
In front this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay of the world, mon partner ask me: Will you marry me?
Crying in the grip of emotion, I answered :YES and we started a family. 136 MOTS

How romantic it is! It feels like a movie!

EXPRESSION 2: indications N°2:

My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day 8 years ago. My partner and I embarked in Buenos Aires on a boat for a 22- (days- cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a 5 (-days- voyage and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de Janiero. We got off the boat to (do a tour of the city. We had climbed (until the top of the rock of (Cristo Redentor's statue (and here my partner took( out a box from his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When the box was opened, a diamond xxxx appeared.
(In front this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay (of the world, (mon partner (ask me:Will you marry me?
Crying in the grip of emotion, I answered :YES and we started a family. 136 MOTS

Belle histoire romantique
Quelques espaces mal positionnés...

EXPRESSION N°2: suggestions N°1:

My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day 8 years ago. My partner and I( boarded a ship in Buenos aires for a 22- day cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a 5 -( day- ( trip and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de (Janiero. We got off the boat to( take a tour of the city. We had climbed (until the top of the rock of (Cristo Redentor's statue and here my partner took( a box out of his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When the box was opened, a diamond XXXX appeared.
In front ( of this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay( in the world,(my partner( asked me: Will you marry me?
Crying( with emotion, I answered :YES and we started a family. 136 MOTS TTBonne correction.

EXPRESSION 2: suggestions N°2:

My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day (eight years ago. My partner and I (boarded a boat in Buenos Aires for a 22-(day cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a (five-day trip and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de Janiero. We got off the boat to (tour the city. We had climbed (until the top of the rock of (Cristo Redentor's statue (when my partner took (a box out of his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When (he opened the box, a diamond XXX appeared.
(In front of this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay (in the world, (my partner (asked me: "Will you marry me?"
Crying in the grip of emotion, I answered: "YES!" and we started a family. 136 MOTS TTBcorrection


- A stopover : UK en deux mots : a stop-over
- OK pour le verbe "board", mais pas pour le temps ... (la précipitation de la fin du texte est déjà annoncée ! )
- Christo Redentor/ Christ the Redeemer
- Un écrin : a case/ a box/ a jewellery case/ jewellery box/

Boat ? or ship ?
"Among sailing vessels, the distinction between ships and boats is that a ship is a square-rigged craft with at least three masts, and a boat isn't. With regard to motorized craft, a ship is a large vessel intended for oceangoing or at least deep-water transport, and a boat is anything else."
Lien internet

This one is funny : Lien internet


- J’ai failli défaillir devant les erreurs dans les adjectifs composés … heureusement bien corrigés !
- Climb until: indique un temps … until I was tired/ 5 o’clock etc. Pour une distance : as far as, mais ici, comme il s’agit de monter : as high as/ ou up as far as … , s’il s’agit d’un gouffre : down as far as… .
- The statue of Christo Redentor, / or better : the statue of Christ the Redeemer on Corcovado.
- a diamond … ring, I assume !
- To propose : demander en mariage => a proposal.
- Après le YES (que l’on sent enthousiaste, j’aurais aimé une petite transition … [ du genre : a few hours/ days/ weeks/ …. later, we started a family …. simplement pour ne pas laisser l’impression que cela s’était fait au pied du Christ Rédempteur devant tout le monde … (ou alors, "we decided to …")
TBon texte, TB corrections.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

EXPRESSION N°3: initial text and preliminary indications:

I always smile when I remember the good times I used to have with my dog.(If I understand well, that poor dog’s dead… ?)
He was hardly three months old when my parents bought him. The first night, he felt alone, he was whining. He didn't want to sleep in his dog basket: we had to let [Ha ha ha!] [Dog power! ] him sleep in my bedroom. He was so attached to us that we could never leave the house without his crying and baying.
I loved playing with him, throwing a tennis ball and seeing him run after it (and keep it for a while before he finally agreed to drop it...)
Whenever we sang, he sang along (or so it seemed...)
He was used to playing with his rug, taking it in his mouth and shaking it. He would never let us take his rug out of his mouth! He would also play with our slippers....
He loved chewing (pressed dog bones ???*: he would start growling and baring his teeth whenever we seemed to approach a hand to take his bone. So one day, I imitated him: before giving him a new bone, I (almost) took it in my mouth, I crouched and jealously kept the bone vertically between my hands on the floor; I pretended to chew it and growled when he came closer. He didn't dare to grab it!
Of course, not all my best memories involve my dog but I wanted to share this part of my happiness with you. Long, but very good! cette EXPRESSION est TB. Bravo.
(244 W) * I had no preliminary knowledge of "pressed bones" ... I know what they are now!


EXPRESSION N°3: indications N°1:

I always smile when I remember the good times I used to have with my dog.
He was hardly three months old when my parents bought him. The first night, he felt alone , he was whining. He didn't want to sleep in his dog basket:x mot de liaison we had to let him sleep in my bedroom. He was so attached to us that we could never leave the house without his crying and baying.
I loved playing with him, throwing a tennis ball and seeing him run after it (and keep it for a while before he finally agreed to drop it...)
Whenever we sang, he sang along (or so it seemed...)
He was used to playing with his rug, taking it in his mouth and shaking it. He would never let us take his rug out of his mouth! He would also play with our slippers....
He loved chewing x pressed dog bones: he would start growling and baring his teeth whenever we seemed to approach a hand to take his bone. So one day, I imitated him: before giving him a new bone, I (almost) took it in my mouth, I crouched x and jealously kept the bone vertically between my hands on the floor; I pretended to chew x it and growled when he came closer. He didn't dare to grab it!
Of course, not all my best memories involve my dog but I wanted to share this part of my happiness with you.
(244 W) TB -mais je ne suis pas forcément d'accord avec les suggestions ...

EXPRESSION N°3: suggestions

I always smile when I remember the good times I used to have with my dog.
He was hardly three months old when my parents bought him. The first night, he felt (lonely ,B he was whining. He didn't want to sleep in his dog basket ( so (n’est sans doute pas le meilleur mot de liaison possible !) we had to let him sleep in my bedroom. He was so attached to us that we could never leave the house without his crying and baying.
I loved playing with him, throwing a tennis ball and seeing him run after it (and keep it for a while before he finally agreed to drop it...)
Whenever we sang, he sang along (or so it seemed...)
He was used to playing with his rug, taking it in his mouth and shaking it. He would never let us take his rug out of his mouth! He would also play with our slippers....
He loved chewing( on pressed dog bones: he would start growling and baring his teeth whenever we seemed to approach a hand to take his bone. So one day, I imitated him: before giving him a new bone, I (almost) took it in my mouth, I crouched x and jealously kept the bone vertically between my hands on the floor; I pretended to chew ( on it and growled when he came closer. He didn't dare to grab it!
Of course, not all my best memories involve my dog but I wanted to share this part of my happiness with you.
(244 W)

- Revoir la différence entre alone et lonely :
- Didn’t know what pressed bones are… I’ve never had a dog!
J’aurais essayé de faire sentir que j’étais bien content qu’il refuse de dormir en dehors de la chambre de l’enfant (la mienne… que je l’avais peut-être encouragé un peu … et que les parents avaient bien compris …)
- pour ce qui est de chew: j'ai bien cherché et trouvé les deux formes employées de façon consécutive dans le même article ... donc, chew bones / chew on bones.
- de même crouch contient déjà le mouvement de descente Lien internet
et crouch/ crouch down s'emploient tous deux.
Cambridge dictionary: crouch
verb [ I ]
UK /kraʊtʃ/ US /kraʊtʃ/

to bend your knees and lower yourself so that you are close to the ground and leaning forward slightly:
She saw him coming and crouched (down) behind a bush.
ceci est différent de sit/ stand/ lie/ qui impliquent une position alors que sit/ down/ up, stand up, lie down indiquent un mouvement.

Voilà trois très bonnes EXPRESSIONS, très bien corrigées ! Bravo à vous ! le but de l'exercice est bien atteint !
Sentez-vous libres de faire tout ou partie de la correction en Follow up Worket si vous posez des questions supplémentaires après la correction de ce F up W, sachez attendre les réponses ... I'm quite swamped just now... a lot for your very good work!



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de magie8, postée le 09-02-2023 à 10:30:04 (S | E)
follow up
Hello!
EXPRESSION 2: suggestion
My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day eight years ago. My partner and I, had boarded on a luxury liner in Buenos-Aires for a 22-day cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a five-day trip and two stop-overs, we arrived in Rio de Janeiro. We got off the cruise-ship to go for a wander around town the city. We had climbed as far as the statue of Christ the Redeemer on Corcovado when my partner removed a jewellery box from his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When he opened the box, a diamond ring appeared.
In front of this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay in the world, my partner made his proposal of marriage :
Crying in the grip of emotion, I answered: "YES!" and we decided to start a family.



Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de here4u, postée le 09-02-2023 à 10:42:29 (S | E)
Hello Magie!

Thanks for you fast Follow up work!

EXPRESSION 2: suggestions

My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day eight years ago. My partner and I had boarded on a luxury liner in Buenos-Aires for a 22-day cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a five-day trip* and two stop-overs, we arrived in Rio de Janeiro. We got off the cruise-ship to go for a wander around town the city. We had climbed as far/ high as the statue of Christ the Redeemer on Corcovado when my partner removed a jewellery box from his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When he opened the box, a diamond ring appeared.
In front of this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay in the world, my partner made his proposal of marriage :
Crying in the grip of emotion, I answered: "YES!" and six months after we decided to start a family.
* J'aimais bien "voyage" qui était le mlot exact pour un voyage en bateau!

TTB Very good work and quite a romantic story! for it, Magie!




Réponse : Let's Suggest/31 de maxwell, postée le 10-02-2023 à 20:39:17 (S | E)
Hello!

EXPRESSION 1: Final suggestions:


I have always dreamt of flying like a bird, and in my craziest dreams I saw myself gliding over the mountains. So you can imagine my happiness when for my 50th birthday, my friends decided to offer me a (paraglider flight. Of course, it was an accompanied flight in tandem with an instructor.
After a long climb, on foot, to "the Arpette" mountain pasture where Serge the shepherd kept his flock, we took off (1) and glided for half an hour.
What a magical flight!
What a feeling of calm and freedom I felt, while admiring these magnificent landscapes! As free as birds, we flew over the Tarentaise valley which I know well from my hikes. Half way down, I could see the picturesque village of Montchavin whose chalets looked tiny from above.
But all things come to an end, and we landed in the meadows near Macot.
That was many years ago, but (I'll keep the images and memories for a long time.

(1) J'ai vu que tu avais souligné "took off". Je n'ai pas compris ce qui ne va pas.


EXPRESSION 2: final suggestions:

My best memory is an event that happened on a beautiful spring day eight years ago. My partner and I (had boarded a boat in Buenos Aires for a 22-day cruise on the Atlantic Ocean.
After a five-day trip and two stopovers, we arrived in Rio de (Janeiro. We got off the boat to tour the city. We had climbed (up to the (statue of Christ the Redeemer on Corcovado when my partner took a box out of his pocket and knelt down in front of me. When he opened the box, a diamond (ring appeared.
In front of this panoramic view of the most beautiful bay in the world, my partner asked me: "Will you marry me?"
Crying (with(1) emotion, I answered: "YES!" and we (decided to start a family. 136 MOTS

(1) Pourquoi est-ce maladroit ici : "in the grip of emotion" ?



EXPRESSION N°3: final suggestions


I always smile when I remember the good times I used to have with my dog.
He was hardly three months old when my parents bought him. The first night, he felt (lonely, he was whining. He didn't want to sleep in his dog basket: we had to let (1) him sleep in my bedroom. He was so attached to us that we could never leave the house without his crying and baying.
I loved playing with him, throwing a tennis ball and seeing him run after it (and keep it for a while before he finally agreed to drop it...)
Whenever we sang, he sang along (or so it seemed...)
He was used to playing with his rug, taking it (with his mouth and shaking it. He would never let us take his rug out of his mouth! He would also play with our slippers....
He loved chewing pressed dog bones: he would start growling and baring his teeth whenever we seemed to approach a hand to take his bone. So one day, I imitated him: before giving him a new bone, I (almost) took it in my mouth, I crouched and jealously kept the bone vertically between my hands on the floor; I pretended to chew it and growled when he came closer. He didn't dare to grab it!
Of course, not all my best memories involve my dog but I wanted to share this part of my happiness with you.

(1) tu as mis en bleu : had to let him..., donc c'est incorrect (sinon tu aurais souligné) : je n'ai pas compris pourquoi c'est incorrect.




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